When we see a child or young person do mean-spirited, thoughtless, immature or stupid things it is easy to take a look at the parents, and to assign blame to those parents who are obviously lacking in parenting skills.

We all encounter them...dreadful kids that either make us think I hope my kids will not turn out to do such things or if that were my child I'd be very embarrassed at the least.

As people age, and gain life experience they tend to mature, and mellow out, at least that has been my observation with only a few exceptions. I have met, and know several people from horrific family circumstances that grew up to be nice, thoughtful, and decent people.

So I guess my question is based around when should this naturally occur? At what point should people have to take responsibility for their own actions, and not hide behind the poor me, look at my bad upbringing excuse for their own bad behavior?

And if they cannot see how their own lack of compassion, maturity, and empathy affects others at what point do we say this person is just a jerk that seemingly does not care a wit for anyone else's feelings beyond their own no matter what their upbringing?